Chapter five
Spiritual Growth
There was a time in my life when I worked for Electrolux
going door to door selling vacuums.
Six months on starvation rations was about all I
could stand, so I quit and went to work for John Hancock peddling insurance.
Both companies had one thing in common: daily sales
meetings.
These meetings had two purposes:
boost the morale of the salespeople not making a
living (most of us), and teach us selling techniques so we would.
As part of the morning ritual was to get us oriented
on a life style that was higher than the one we were living.
We were told we could have boats, fancy cars, big
houses, earn a $100,000.00 +.
(Remember, that was in the 70s.) How much we made
was all determined by how much we wanted.
All we had to do was sell, sell, sell.
The key to our success, we were told, was up to us.
All we needed was the determination to succeed. If
we had the determination, they had the products that would get us there.
It sounded good to me, and I knew I had the determination
to succeed.
So, when I quit John Hancock and became a painting
contractor, I carried all that hype with me.
I was convinced it was up to me how much money I
made and how big my company became.
Believing in the slogan, “You are what you think,” I
had decided to become the largest painting contractor in the Tidewater area of
Virginia.
I went after business in a grand way and, because I was a
good salesman, my business grew fast.
Too fast.
Before I knew it, I had painters going in every
direction of Virginia.
I had money coming in by the wheelbarrows full.
Unfortunately, it was going out by truck loads.
Soon I had outgrown my management capabilities.
Paydays would roll around and there wouldn’t be
enough money to pay both my employees and myself, too.
Before I realized what was happening, I was trying
to live on less than eighty dollars a month.
Even in ‘75 that wasn’t enough.
Having recently moved there from San Jose, California, I
didn’t know anyone except my brother.
We lived on different social levels and had
different interests, so, in addition to my business problems, once again I was
lonely, miserable and broke.
Except for my kids I had no one to talk with except
God.
At this point, however, my relationship with God seemed to
be one way—I prayed my buns off while God rolled over, yawned and went back to
sleep.
This was the situation when some evangelists came by to
chat one evening after work.
After exchanging pleasantries, we got to the nutty
nitty gritty of their visit...
“Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior,”
they asked?
As sarcastically as I could I replied, “Oh Lord yes!”
After that our conversation went downhill rather quickly.
After they left I started my evening ritual of meditation
and prayer.
It was then I realized that, even though I disagreed with
their door to door “accept Jesus and repent” philosophy, I did, in fact, believe
Jesus was the son of God.
“Maybe,” I thought, “I should make a formal
declaration to this effect.
Tonight, I decided, I would do just that.”
Sooo, during meditation I formally surrendered my life to
Jesus.
Well, almost anyway.
For some unknown reason, I offered Jesus my personal
life but told Him, “You don’t need to bother with my business, I’ll take care of
that.”
At the time I thought I just didn’t want to bother poor
little old Jesus with the mundane affairs of running a business.
Why should He be bothered with chasing down my
money?
Why should He be bothered with bookkeeping entries?
I’m sure it had nothing to do with any unethical
business practices I might be using.
NO! Of course not!
In my effort to become the largest contractor in the area,
I did whatever I felt necessary to achieve my goal.
If a question of honesty or ethics arose, hey, I
mean, what’s a fellow to do, right?
I conveniently put God and Jesus high on a shelf and
out of sight, right up there with honesty, goodness and spirituality.
I also took them down whenever convenient, such as
in the morning and evening when I meditated.
And, (of course), I prayed for help with my slightly
less than ethical dealings.
Anyway, my social life made a hundred and eighty degree
turn around.
I became active in a church, started teaching Sunday school
and was on most of the church committees.
I even led a class on the “Spiritual Life of the
Christian.” Shoot! I was invited to parties and out for dinner.
Socially I was successful and happy.
My professional life, however, was still in the toilet.
It wasn’t until nearly three years later that I woke up to
what was going on.
I was downstairs in my office one morning preparing
for the day.
I sat at my desk with my pencil in my hand while
contemplating both the day’s schedule and the amount of money coming in as
compared to the amount of money going out.
Suddenly I knew this was pure garbage.
I couldn’t live this way any longer.
In exasperation I flipped my pencil high in the air,
flopped back in my chair and said, “That’s it!
I can’t take it anymore!
God, you’ll have to take the business too.”
My God, (literally) what a turn around.
For the first time since getting out of the navy
(nine years earlier) I began earning a decent living.
I started working for honest people.
I no longer had to chase after money.
Within a month I had painted two churches—I hadn’t
even estimated one prior to this.
Life became worth living.
This is the point where I started living what I believed.
Prior to this I had been actively seeking, but had
not yet put the knowledge gained through seeking into my life style.
I was afraid to trust God with my life because I
thought I might have to change the way I lived¾which
was lousy anyway.
It’s amazing how we hold on to things we’re familiar
with, even though we know they harm us[1].
Because I prayed, asking for divine help without living a
spiritual life, I not only didn’t prosper, I sincerely believe I was actually
being held back.
In order to spiritually grow, I needed to learn to
live what I believed.
I needed to learn to live a spiritually honest and
forthright life.
This same principle applies to everyone.
When we reach up in prayer asking God to help us, we
must be willing to change and to live out of what we believe.
This how we grow spiritually.
If I had been a painting contractor who never prayed and
didn’t care a whit about God or spirituality, I could have been a ruthless
business man who prospered.
Most of the richest organizations in the world are
non-spiritual in nature. They don’t care about anything other than the almighty
dollar—the bottom line.
When we go through steps leading to spiritual growth, such
as praying, meditating, going to church, synagogue or mosque and yet our life is
still filled with non-spiritual habits, such as hating, criticizing, lying,
cheating, stealing, gossiping, etc., we are failing to grow.
These are like fences keeping us away from God.
We can see it, we can sense it, we can feel it, but
we can’t get there.
Even though God is on the fringe of our life, we
don’t seem to prosper.
In this regard, it’s like getting hired by a major
corporation and getting none of the benefits associated with that company.
We’re in the spiritual Family all right, but we’re
not participating fully in all the Family benefits.
Even though our prayers may get answered, we don’t
seem to reap any advantage from the answers. That’s because we don’t get
rewarded for wrong thinking, cheating or lying.
But gently, ever so gently, God continuously works
to bring us into universal alignment, meaning that we become loving and
forgiving people.
Fortunately, God accepts us as we are, complete with flaws,
blemishes and scars.
The thief on the cross led a blemished life right up
to the end (as far as we know).
Yet, with the first step at the very last moment, he
slid into heaven.
(See Luke 23 regarding the crucifixion, but more
specifically, verses 39 through 43.)
Yep!
Once we’ve taken the first step, we’re in the
family, alright.
This means that, even though we may not reap full
benefits, we are sometimes used to bring help to others.
For example:
After moving back to Virginia from San Jose, my greatest
desire was to move out west again.
Only one thing stopped me:
money.
Prior to giving God my business, one morning I was down
stairs in my office and going over my books.
Suddenly I realized we were about to clear over
three thousand dollars on the jobs we were finishing.
Excitedly, I sprang out of my chair and rushed
upstairs to spread the good news.
“We’re going to Californy!”
All the rest of the day I was mentally packing the truck
while visualizing myself traveling across country.
Yup!
All day I was one happy traveler, headed west.
That evening, however, the phone rang…
“Bucky?”
“Yes Ma?”
“We need your help.
Papa has to go into the hospital and there’s no one
here to take care of me.
Can you come?”
“Yes ma’am.”
My mother had been the victim of two strokes, two by-pass
operations and Parkinson’s disease and, at that time, she had been bed-ridden
for nearly eight years.
My dad had been taking care of her alone during this
period, but now he needed help.
The trip to Florida for a one month stay, while supporting
my family in Virginia, came to $3016.32.
The amount of money I cleared?
$3016.92.
I suspect the trip probably cost $3016.92 and I made
$ .60 error.
So much for “westward ho!”
There are no half way measures in living a spiritual life.
We either are or we aren’t.
So if you find yourself on the same treadmill day
after day, praying for change, but nothing’s happening, or, if it does, it has
the wrong results, perhaps it’s time to take stock of how you’re living.
Sort of flop back in your chair, flip your pencil in
the air and say, “God, you’re going to have to take my ......... (whatever it
may be), too!”
Most of us hold something back from God, possibly because
we’re ashamed of it.
Sometimes, however, because we’ve obligated
ourselves to God, we’re able to justify our wrong deeds and thoughts.
Members of the KKK do this regularly, as do all
supremacist groups, white or black.
It’s now time to let go of the hatred.
We can never hate or harm anyone and have it
justified because we believe in God.[2]
All of us seeking to grow spiritually must first make a
conscious commitment and dedication to do so, which must then be followed by
effort.
After making our commitment, the spiritual learning process
becomes both a conscious and unconscious procedure. You may not have any idea of
what it is you’re supposed to do, so pray for two things: protection from being
misled; secondly, pray for guidance and help.
Simply
put, spirituality is living in close association with the Divine through belief,
faith and trust.
Most of us would have no problem with that, if
that’s all there was to it.
The hard part is learning to combine our
spirituality into our life styles.
This is not as easy as it might seem because it
often requires breaking life-long habits.
Like anything else of value, it seems that
spirituality must be earned.
In this regard, “The best things in life are free,” is not
always true.
Except for appreciation of life, nature and beauty, nothing
in life worth having is free.
Nothing has any value if it isn’t earned, meaning
that we have to put forth an effort.
Those people who are trying to lose weight must put
forth an effort; the effort is in the form of denial, and it is not easy because
it requires changing a lifetime of habitual snacking.
But those who are willing to make the tremendous
sacrifice lose weight.
It’s the same with those who are trying to quit
smoking; they must put forth an effort in the form of denial in order to stop,
which takes tremendous willpower. (However, recall Sylvia’s story in the
shower.)
The effort that is required to achieve these goals is often
pure agony because it requires overcoming habits that have taken a life time to
acquire.
This type of effort starts in the mind with a decision to
overcome the physical habits that afflict us because our entire life is guided
by our mind and thoughts¾most
of which are unconscious.
Reaching for more food or another cigarette is not a
conscious thought.
It is a reaction to habits established over the
years.
(With cigarettes there is also a chemical addiction.)
Almost everything we do is out of habit. Gossiping is a
habit we have developed, as is stealing, working, dressing, brushing our teeth,
driving a car, etc.
Our habits are our thought patterns that help
develop our life styles.
Whatever life style we’ve developed is another
habit.
That is why I had to overcome the unethical habits I had
developed when I carried my selling thought patterns into my painting business.
In my determination to succeed I always put my wants
ahead of the needs of my clients.
This is not living in accordance with the highest
principles of the universe¾“love
your neighbor as yourself.”
Had I put my clients needs first, my own needs would
have been filled anyway, because everything is reciprocal.
It works because like attracts like.
My clients still needed their house painted and I was the
contractor they were talking to, so, what’s the difference?
The difference is a very subtle change of attitude.
Yes, my clients still needed to have work done, but
my reason for doing the work shifted.
After surrendering the business, rather than
worrying about how much money I was going to make, or what was the quickest way
of doing the work, or where could I get the cheapest materials, I became
concerned about the best way of fulfilling their needs. Their interests took
priority over mine.
When tempted to do something quicker or easier I
would hear that “thought voice” ask, “Would you do it that way if you were
painting for God.”
The answer was always clear.
And it often was the quicker, easier way.
Plus I knew I had done it to the best of my
abilities. That meant my conscience was clear.
Whatever you do for someone else, do it as though you were
doing it for God, because you actually are.
Every human being on the face of the earth is a
child of God, even though they, themselves, don’t know it, act like it, or
recognize it.
See if that doesn’t make a difference in your life.
(See Matthew 25:31-45: whatever you do for another,
you’re doing it either to or for God.)
There is a branch of the New Age philosophy that believes
it doesn’t matter who we harm or what we do.
That nothing is either bad or wrong; it is only an
experience we have. This type of thinking tells us that, “Hitler did no wrong.
He was just having an experience.”
This type of thinking says that, “ISIS does no
wrong—they’re just having an experience.”
Nut!
We’re not here to hurt people or “have an
experience.”
This is our birth place.
Here
is where we make the ultimate decision to become children of the universe, or
live a life that is terminated at the grave.
We’re here to develop spirituality through finding
faith and belief.
We’re here to reach for God in any manner we can
understand, and live out of the principles of our loving faith.
All who truly learn to love God also learn to love
their neighbor.
(I also believe this is sometimes reversed; that
people come to God by their natural love of people.)
God is in all human beings, but not every life is a
spiritual one.
Any life willingly
shared with God becomes a spiritual
life. That is why God is so willing to forgive the sinner.
The life of a “spiritual sinner” differs from the
life of a saint only because they have attained different spiritual levels of
sensitivity, understanding and receptivity.
[3]
The people of history deemed to
be ‘saints,’ spent years in preparation through prayer, meditation and living
out of what they knew.
The spiritual fledgling has spent far less time in
prayer, meditation and discovering the will of God, but are still the beloved
children of God.
Belief, faith and trust are developed through our desire to
learn, know and follow the will of God.
This will eventuate into love because the will of
God is that we learn to:
a.
“love
Him with all our hearts, minds and souls,” and that we,
b.
“love our neighbors as ourselves.”
The extent to which we know and follow the will of God is an indication of our
attained level of spirituality. Our “level” is something none of us know or are
aware of, either in ourselves or in others.
If you’re a parent who enjoys your children, you can
understand our relationship with God.
If you were a happy child who loved and enjoyed your
parents and family, then you understand our connection with God.
This is the relationship of the Creative Parent with
the entire universe, including earth.
Our involvement as children of the Supreme is to:
a.
recognize
we have Creator Parent,
b.
recognize that we are children of
the Divine and, as a result,
c.
recognize that all others are our
brothers and sisters.
Spiritual growth is only attained by learning,
understanding and living out of the nature of God.
It is a gradual process that first begins by the
recognition, feeling, or sense that there is “Something More,” and that
Something” is normally called “God.”
This often leads to “church investigation.”
(The type of church depends only on our family, our
country or our ethnic origins.)
If our searching continues, our pursuit of spirituality
will eventually lead us to the point where we begin to both to feel the presence
and hear the voice of Deity.
This is very special and wonderful time that cannot
be described.
(The joy that is felt throughout the universe when a person
begins to hear and respond to the inner voice of Deity, is the same joy a parent
feels when a baby is born, takes his or her first step or says his or her first
word.)
It is unfortunate that the word “spirituality” so often
brings to mind a long robed, sandal clad, starry eyed mystic perched atop a huge
mountain in Tibet.
Usually this person is either a hermit or lives in a
small monastery surrounded by a handful of proselytes.
Always he is being sought out for the wonderful
words of wisdom that drip from his tongue like honey.
False image!
Spiritual people do not shun the real world.
Instead, they live in it among ordinary people.
The truly spiritual person bravely faces the same
risks, trials and tribulations everyone else does, because spirituality is
obtained by overcoming the material hindrances of the world—not in escaping or
hiding from them.
In addition to living in the real world, spirituality is
obtained by being open to higher learning.
We should never stop seeking the higher truth
because there is always more to learn.
(That’s what eternity is for—to learn and keep on
learning.)
When we think we know the “truth,” or “the way,” we cease
our spiritual growth.
This is the major stumbling block of all organized
religions—some more than others.
Anyone who seeks with an open mind is going to get taught,
one way or another.
Buddha put it this way: “When the student is ready,
the teacher will appear.” Jesus put it another way: “Ask and you shall receive;
seek and you shall find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”
When we become interested in a spiritual question,
we are unfailingly led to the individual who knows and—without being
asked—volunteers the information we are seeking.
Or, we may “accidentally” discover the answer in the
book we just “happened” to pick up.
The only requirement on our part is that we have an
open mind, a willingness to learn and a desire that “Thy {God’s} will be done in
our lives.” The person holding the answer to our question may be a person of
questionable attributes, reputation and spirituality.
Steve was such a person.
He was a petty thief who also dealt in drugs.
Still, he was seeking higher truth, albeit it, in
his own way.
At the time we met, I was looking for a building for my
small church and had been using a Realtor friend of mine, Walt Farmer, to look
at many building sites.
Quite by accident another Realtor found the building
and I made an offer through her.
Guilt now set in.
It didn’t seem right, perhaps even unethical, to cut
Walt out of a commission he had worked so long for simply because a chance
comment by someone else led me to the building I was seeking.
I thought of many ways to tell Walt what had happened, and
had finally decided to tell a white lie in order to save face, and, hopefully,
our friendship.
While talking with Steve about something else, he
just happened to mention something his dad always said, “You don’t have to be a
thief to be dishonest.”
Boy how those words struck home.
I called the other Realtor and told her the deal was
off.
When she asked why, I said that I didn’t like what I was
doing to Walt.
She wasn’t happy, but she said, “OK.”
About thirty minutes later she called me back and told me
she had contacted Walt and they decided it would be OK to split the commission.
The universe works in mysterious ways.
It seems that we were supposed to have the building,
but everything needed to be on the up and up.
Yes, the universe works in strange ways to get us where we
should be and doing what we should be doing.
It works for all of us.
We only need to be open to it.
Nor does our need have to be spiritual…
Jackie, my wife’s daughter, has spent her whole life
playing piano and is a wonderful pianist and accompanist.
Prior to earning her Masters degree, but after a
lifetime of schooling, she developed a condition very much like carpal tunnel
syndrome. The
condition was so bad she could no longer play more than five minutes at a time.
She went to several physicians, including the best
that was recommended.
The prognosis?
Operate.
Unfortunately, she was told that if it was operated
on she might never be able to play again.
Now what was she to do?
She prayed about it.
She asked that her name be put on various prayer
chains and life went on.
This was the condition when, through a very unique
set of circumstances, she unexpectedly ran into one of her old music teachers, a
Dr. Wienrock.
She told him what had happened to her hand and he
immediately made an appointment for her to come to his studio and sit down and
play.
After he watched her for a few minutes, he said “You’re
holding your hands wrong.
Play like this. . .” and demonstrated hand position.
That’s all it took.
It was that simple.
She’s never had a problem since, and she plays many
hours a day.
Because practice makes perfect, the more we live out of our
spirituality the more spiritual we become.
The more spiritual we become, the more the universe
responds to our needs—all of them.
We do this by opening up and learning to trust our
lives to God and by learning to trust others.
Since the Kindred Spirit Connection works on a “like
attracts like” principle, in order to trust people we must, ourselves, be
trustworthy.
Since not all people are honest and trustworthy, the
Kindred Spirit Connection seems to take over by guiding us to those people who
are honest and trustworthy.
(When I surrendered my painting business to God, for
example, my business associates changed abruptly.
It was not a slow transition, it was immediate.)
Since not everyone in the world is trustworthy, when your
intuition cries out to be careful, listen to it.
That warning voice is also a part of the Kindred
Spirit Connection warning you to BEWARE!
In my dealings with people, this voice has never
failed.
And, when I’ve ignored it, problems have always ensued.[4]
Equally necessary for spiritual growth is the ability to
question religious dogma.
Simply by virtue of being human even the most holy
of people are fallible, and all the earth’s religions are founded and headed by
people.
Though based on truth, all the major religions have had
intense periods of darkness.
The same religion that gave us the New Testament
also gave us the Inquisition.
Additionally, the Salem witch trials were partially
the result of overzealous religious persecution.
So, don’t be afraid to question.
Only a fool accepts what he is told without
question.
The churches that made errors in past centuries are no less
fallible today.
Doubting religious creeds and dogmas is not the same as
doubting God.
If the Catholic Church hadn’t made such radical changes in
the 60’s, I would probably still be a non-questioning Catholic.
Thankfully, all those sweeping reforms made me
think.
I could not understand why the sins of yesterday, such as
eating meat on Friday, were sins yesterday, but OK today.
To me that only meant one of two things: either God
was wishy-washy and changed His mind a lot, or the Popes were fallible and
didn’t speak the word of God as I had been taught he did.
In other words:
I questioned.
I found the answers unacceptable.
I rejected.
I prayed for guidance.
I looked in other places.
That original rejection is quite possibly one of the most
painfully conscious decisions I ever made in my life.
It also opened doors of learning and spiritual
growth that would never have been possible otherwise.
It is rare that spiritual growth is without pain.
It’s like going from adolescence into adulthood.
Why should anyone bother to become more spiritual?
Especially if it might be disagreeable or painful?
Because every place we look in our world we see the results
of a world populated and ruled by predominantly non-spiritual people.
Consider these: Why is there a homeless problem?
Why is there less than thirty years worth of oil in
the ground, yet we still drive cars and pump oil?
Why is strip mining still allowed? Why is fracking
allowed? Why is there graft in politics, business and elsewhere?
Why is there rape?
Why is there theft?
Why is there murder?
Why are our forests decimated?
Why do athletes¾already
making millions¾go
on strike?
Why are people starving in South Africa?
Why is pornography, in any form, such a big seller?
Why
does ISIS doing televised beheadings bring in more recruits?
And
the list goes on and on.
The answer is simply because our world is rich in religion
while languishing in spiritual poverty.
The majority of our world only pays lip-service to
God, but is too preoccupied with personal gain to seek God on a one on one
basis.
Simply believing in God is not enough. Even Satan believes
in God.
Simply going to church is not enough.
All non-spiritual people lack harmony with the universe.
Universal disharmony always results in personal
chaos because it is an unnatural state.
If, as on our world, there is a disproportionately
high ratio of disharmonized people, the entire system becomes infected.
There is nothing negative on earth that is not a
result of this runaway malignant infection.
Nothing.
Earthly
peace and harmony can only come through the spirituality of the people living
here.
When we become spiritually alive, we become active and
participating citizens of the world, allowing the Spirit of God to be reflected
into the world by our individual acts. Every spiritual act is the act of agapé
love.
You can’t work for God without being spiritual.
Spirituality is alignment with God and the Universe.
By becoming spiritual persons we are automatically
ushered into the Spiritual Family of this heavenly Kingdom.
Some people refer to this as being “Cosmic
Citizens,” and, indeed, the term is synonymous.
We cannot be in the “Kingdom of God” (Cosmic
Citizens) without being spiritual human beings first.
Cosmic citizenship is not an inherent birth right.
It is an earned privilege.
The God who holds the planets in the palm of His hand, sets
the suns in their orbits, separates the seasons and causes the rain to fall on
the just and the unjust, is the same God who allows us to do just as we jolly
well please.
Coercion and compulsion are not a part of the universal
scheme.
We must choose our own path in life, and the choice is
solely ours.
Ultimately, the choices are simple and only two: we live
either in the light or in the dark.
When we choose the light, we are kindred spirits.
Kindred spirits always receive help.
When we choose the darkness, we’re on our own.
I suspect (though I can’t prove it) that a hundred years
ago people were more spiritual than today, simply because life was harder and
more uncertain, causing people to reach up in prayer more.
As a result of their prayers, they lived closer to
God.
Today there is too little time, too much noise (such as
loud music, inane prattle, the roar of traffic and the meaningless babble of
TV).
All these things continually fight for possession of our
minds, inhibiting thought.
Life is so hectic there is no time to oneself for
contemplative meditation.
Spiritual growth cannot be developed without periods of
contemplation or meditation in isolation.
This is why all the great Biblical prophets spent
large amounts of time in the desert, alone.
During biblical times, (and even up to a hundred
years ago) traveling alone could mean days—or even months—of isolation with no
one to talk to but yourself, your pack animal, God, or all three.
For those who were spiritually inclined, it was only
natural to spend large amounts of time in prayer.
Since all prayer gets answered, the prophets who
made it in to the Bible are the ones who listened, heard and responded.
Praying in isolation is also why Jesus said, “When you pray go into your private
room…” which is strange wording because in those days nobody had a private
room—houses were predominantly one room affairs).
Most of us can’t take Sahara sabbaticals for our spiritual
growth.
But, we can spend at least a few minutes of every day in
seclusion, tucked away in our own private corners, talking—and listening—to God.
This time alone will help our sanity, help us relax,
and help us to grow spiritually.
By asking for help while meditating and praying we
are unconsciously accepting the love of God, whether we realize it or not.
It’s impossible to accept the love of God without growing spiritually.
[1] I understand
that abused women also do this
[2] At the time
of this updated version, it is June of 2018. This type of bias and
hatred are now present in our own government. It may had always been
there, but now it’s blatant. There are and will be negative
repercussions for this unless it changes abruptly.
[3]
The spiritual sinner cannot remain a sinner.
Eventually a choice must be made and growth
must begin.
The thief on the cross made an earnest last
ditch decision.
His growth was to begin in another realm.
[4]
Because of
biological “save the species” instincts, I’ve observed that women often
read other women more accurately, while men often read other males more
accurately.